I have loved pageants since I was a little girl. I used to eagerly anticipate watching the Miss America pageant every year. I was so into it that I would write down all of the contestants' names on a pad of paper so that I could score them myself. I also taped the pageants so that I could watch them again later. And for Halloween one year I dressed up as Miss Colorado. So, you get the idea.
Anyway, given my love for pageants, you can imagine the unparalleled thrill I felt at being crowned "Miss Island of Beauty" at the Tapawingo Mother/Daughter Retreat this past weekend. Especially since I was up against such worthy opponents.
The theme for the weekend was "True Beauty," so it didn't take too long for us to come up with the idea to include a sort of mock beauty pageant as a surprise event for the weekend. Tapawingo is called the "Island of Beauty" - so it was perfect. We all took on a ridiculous name of a Tapawingo building and came up with a platform for what we would like to change at the island. I was Miss Scrub 'Um--the wash house--(classy, I know), and my platform was to add a bathroom to each cabin. That was a hit from the start.
Anyway, given my love for pageants, you can imagine the unparalleled thrill I felt at being crowned "Miss Island of Beauty" at the Tapawingo Mother/Daughter Retreat this past weekend. Especially since I was up against such worthy opponents.
The theme for the weekend was "True Beauty," so it didn't take too long for us to come up with the idea to include a sort of mock beauty pageant as a surprise event for the weekend. Tapawingo is called the "Island of Beauty" - so it was perfect. We all took on a ridiculous name of a Tapawingo building and came up with a platform for what we would like to change at the island. I was Miss Scrub 'Um--the wash house--(classy, I know), and my platform was to add a bathroom to each cabin. That was a hit from the start.
We had an evening gown competition on Saturday night, which was priceless. The gowns were so beautifully hideous. My vote goes to Miss Makum 'N Takum for her bright blue dress with wings. I sported my "Sisters" dress for one last Tapawingo showing. Who doesn't love Pepto-Bismal pink?
We also did the interview competition at that time. And, of course, we thought it would be funnier if we didn't know the questions up front. It was. My question was something along the lines of, "If you were Scrubbin' Bubbles, what part of the bathroom would you clean first?" Hmmm... good question. Before I knew it I was talking about fungus in showers and wishing I could start the whole thing over. But we all ended with world peace, so it was fine.
My favorite interview question was Miss Buddy Board's. "If you were to go on a date with the Banana Boat, where would you go and why?" Wow--it's pretty hard to prepare for that one. After a few "ums"... "probablys".... and "most likelys," Miss Buddy Board opted for an ice cream parlor where they could order a banana split to make him feel more at home. Good idea.
We also did the interview competition at that time. And, of course, we thought it would be funnier if we didn't know the questions up front. It was. My question was something along the lines of, "If you were Scrubbin' Bubbles, what part of the bathroom would you clean first?" Hmmm... good question. Before I knew it I was talking about fungus in showers and wishing I could start the whole thing over. But we all ended with world peace, so it was fine.
My favorite interview question was Miss Buddy Board's. "If you were to go on a date with the Banana Boat, where would you go and why?" Wow--it's pretty hard to prepare for that one. After a few "ums"... "probablys".... and "most likelys," Miss Buddy Board opted for an ice cream parlor where they could order a banana split to make him feel more at home. Good idea.
My favorite event was the talent competition. There was fiddling, harmonica playing, very enthusiastic cheerleading, and hula dancing. Everyone was fabulous. For my talent, I wrote and performed a song to more fully explain my platform. It was cleverly titled "Bathrooms in Each Cabin." Here are the lyrics:
Our little Island of Beauty in the middle of the lake
Was masterfully constructed with just one small mistake.
The builder had to be a man, at least that's what I must assume.
Who else would build a camp for girls with only one bathroom?
Our little Island of Beauty in the middle of the lake
Was masterfully constructed with just one small mistake.
The builder had to be a man, at least that's what I must assume.
Who else would build a camp for girls with only one bathroom?
We need... Bathrooms in each cabin with ceramic tile floors
And some large steam showers with some etched glass doors.
And we need ten sink consoles with ten matching mirrors.
And those fancy hotel bathrobes would make nice souvenirs.
And some large steam showers with some etched glass doors.
And we need ten sink consoles with ten matching mirrors.
And those fancy hotel bathrobes would make nice souvenirs.
You may think it's a bit much, but your girls will be elated,
'Cause deep down we all know that rustic is way overrated.
'Cause deep down we all know that rustic is way overrated.
We need... Bathrooms in each cabin with some large jetted tubs
And a few assorted bath salts and some scented shower scrubs.
And a sauna in the foyer where the girls could all relax
With some extra fluffy towels on those heated towel racks.
And a few assorted bath salts and some scented shower scrubs.
And a sauna in the foyer where the girls could all relax
With some extra fluffy towels on those heated towel racks.
And I know it's just a camp, but we could always change our lingo.
I think we should rename the island Spa Tapawingo.
I think we should rename the island Spa Tapawingo.
We need... Bathrooms in each cabin; I'll be starting a petition.
And I hope that you will sign your name and join me on this mission.
And I hope that you will sign your name and join me on this mission.
The pageant ended on Sunday morning when the honor I had hoped for all weekend was graciously bestowed upon me. I got a crown, a sash, and a bouquet of flowers, and I even got to walk the runway. My pageant dreams were fulfilled.
But don't worry, Miss Buddy Board, if for any reason I am unable to fulfill my duties as Miss Island of Beauty (I'm not exactly sure what those are), I'll pass the crown on to you. But don't hold your breath.
7 comments:
MEEP! That's so exciting! Go you! (Though I'm so not surprised.) ;-)
And your song was hilarious, I was laughing out loud.
Congratulations! Who would've thought that after all those years of faithful pageant watching you would be rewarded with a pageant win of your own. I think that the appropriate thing to do, of course, would be to celebrate - in Hawaii. :)
I'm sure you were gracious in the interview
and stunning in the gown
but the song you composed and sung won you the sparkling crown!
May your year be filled with clean bathrooms (olive tubs?) and etched glass.
oops - should've been sang. But you know that!
I love your enthusiasm for the pagents. I ranked the participants too, although I never did "live the dream." Congratulations on your win! I think your song must have put them over the edge!
Yeah SIS! I'm so proud. But about Miss Buddy Board's question... I read it not as going on a date "with" the banana boat, but "riding" on the banana boat to get to your date destination. Am I wrong? Similar to the question, "Miss Rhode Island, please describe your idea of a perfect date. " ... "That's a tough one. I would have to say April 25th. Because it's not too hot, not too cold, all you need is a light jacket." Ha!
This is a hilarious post. If only I could have been there! Did Wahonka or Little Sis compete? I know sometimes they lack depth, but in an evening gown - who knows? Plus now that Wahonka has had her facelift (which as I recall you and I attempted once, with hideous and might I add scary results) you never know. What makes me sad is I didn't even see her in the audience - I truly hope she wasn't stuck somewhere BOARD to tears. (tee hee)
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